COMPOSITA. 



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IN THREE ACTS. 



OA^E OF HER COiMPONEyTS. 




Represented at Smith College. 
June 19. 1SS6. 



V 



rsx 



Entered according to Act of Congress, in the year 1887, by 

ZULEMA A. RUBLE, . . ■ , 

In the office of the Librarian of Congress, at Washington. 



Canton Register Printing House, Canton, 111. 



INTRODUCTION. 



This little Drama connects itself with the new process of 
composite photography, by which the negatives of several 
persons are combined upon one plate and printed, giving the 
photograph of a single individual. Such a photograph of the 
class of '86 was taken with remarkable success. The myste- 
rious face almost convinces the beholder that the spirit of the 
class of '86 once put on human guise and sat for her picture. 
This embodied soul of "Eighty-Six" is the central figure of 
the play. 

Canton, Illinois, January 27, 1S87. 



DRAMATIS PERSON.^. 



Hermes, Herald of the Gods. 

Persephone, Queen of Hades. 

Minos, ^ 

^Acus. y Judges of the Lower World. 

Rhadamanthus, J 

Homer, the Greek Poet. 

EuGLiD, the Mathematician. 

Sappho, the Poetess. 

Socrates, the Philosopher. 

Horace, the Roman Poet. 

Hannibai;, the Carthaginian General. 

Baron Leibnitz. 

Sir Isaac Newton. 

Archbishop Whately. 

Mr. Hill, Author of a Manual of Punctuation. 

CoMPOsiTA Octoginta-Sex. 

Shade of Political Economy. 

Shade of Political Science. 

lulus. Telegraph Messenger. 

Scrub Lady. 

Scene — During the Second Act, in Smith College ; during 
the rest of the play, in Hades. 



PROLOGUE. 



We beseech your patience while you hsten to the veritable, 
moving and instructive account of the doom which befell the 
hapless maid, Composita Octoginta-Sex. 

For in the eighteen hundred and eighty-second year of our 
era came a band of maidens, eighty-three in all, unto a temple 
reared by Hephaestios, but dedicate to Pallas Athene, and 
there gave themselves to the priests and priestesses of Pallas 
that they might learn of the wisdom of the Maid Divine. But 
fateful Nemesis over-ruled the wills of some and sent them far- 
wandering, to seek other shrines, and only nine and forty re- 
mained. Now when Hephaestios, cunning workman, saw 
the.se nine and forty souls, he besought the far-darting God of 
Light that he might be permitted in his wonderful Smithy to 
weld these many souls into one being, who, far surpassing 
Psyche, should cast shame upon the beloved of Eros, hated son 
of scorniul Aphrodite. And the God, though doubting, con- 
sented; nor did Pallas withhold her consent, for well did she 
foreknow the unerring laws of Nemesis. 

So was the daring work accomplished; nor yet without dan- 
ger, for the spirits of the air strove against Helios; and, on one 
bitter night, almost did Boreas bear away the multiple being 
on his freezing wings. But at last the many souls were wrought 
into one form, receiving the name of Composita and also of 
Octoginta-Sex for in the year eighteen hundred and eighty- 
six was she to pass triumphant the Judges in gloomy Hades 
and receive reward from Zeus, the father of Gods and men. 

So dreamed Hephaestios and his cunning workmen; but 
alas, alas! so willed not Nemesis. L. B. H. 



COMPOSITA 



ACT I. 



Scene: Hall of Justice in the leftiving of King Pluto's Palace. 
The Judges, heavily draped in white cloth leavifig visible only 
their ghastly faces and flowing beards, are seated in a row 
like Egyptian colossi and remain motionless throughout the 
scene. ' 

Minos. Brethren, we are come to hold a consultation upon 
a case more complicated than hath ever yet come within our 
jurisdiction. We shall have need each of the other's informa- 
tion concerning her who is about to appear before the bar. 

Aeacus. The defendant's lustral name is Composita Octo- 
ginta-Sex. No records of her ancestry have been discovered. 

Rhadamanthus . Then must she be consigned to the abode 
of the unknown. 

Ae. Nay, Rhadamanthus, that were a rash verdict. and one 
for which Queen Persephone would be as fleet as Justice in call- 
ing thee to account. For dost thou think our noble Lady's in- 
terest in these proceedings will be slight? By the dread Styx, 
thou canst not! Take a lesson then from the care with which 
she investigateth a mystery. 

Rhad. Send me not to learn of a woman, Aeacus ! Solomon 
had not in mind one of your degenerate Myrmidon subjects, 
when he made an ant the oracle of wisdom. 

Min. We can not be too careful, brothers, to possess our- 
selves of all the facts in this case. They seem to indicate that 
we must pass judgment upon this shade, not as being one ot 
earth's outcasts, but as a primitive being, such as was the first 
man, Adam. Nay, it is even said that her orign is divine, that 
she is the child of Ether and of Light. 

Rhad. Such an origin would scarce be credited in the insti- 
tution whence she cometh, where, as I hear, they accept the 



COMPOSITA. 7 

heresy that the Gods have neither part nor interest in human 
affairs. 

Min. Thou hast not heard, Rhadamanthus; thou hast read 
that in that denominational, earthly sheet thou wilt persist in 
subscribing for. I tell thee, thou wouldst better let it alone. 
Either facts there are not facts here, or their ethics differeth 
from ours. Earthly newspapers are but confused tongues in 
Hades. 

Rhad. 'Tis a virtue to keep up with the times. 

Min. Justice will never be behind them. We must e'en 
hasten our steps now if we would overtake her. Have you fur- 
ther information, Aeacus? 

Ae. She is known to be a compound of fifty elementary 
souls, each a negative existence, yet bound together by a firm 
affinity. Such miracle was wrought by the famous magician 
whose address is "Laboratory, Smith College, Northampton," 
where he retails genuine perfumes of Tartarus. Not only does 
he delight the olfactories, but all the senses of mortals are 
wrought to his will. The fame oi Orpheus is shamed by his 
skill. Harp, viol, reed-pipe, organ-pipe, fork, stick and string 
and the maidens gathered about him responsively sing, lured 
by the note from his brazen Siren's throat. 

Rhad. Enough, Aeacus, enough! This is not a symposium 
under the auspices of the Muses, but a tribunal of Justice. 
Facts, I say, let us have facts. She is a compound soul, made 
up of fifty simple souls. My opinion is that we should select 
the elementary soul which has most involved itself in evil and 
pass judgment upon it according to its deserts; and its doom 
all the rest must share, being indissolubly yoked unto it. So 
only can its evil be expiated. 

Ae. Nay Rhadamanthus, thou dost ever suffer harshness to 
overstep equity in thy sentences. I claim that we can only ful- 
fill the requirements of Justice by judging each individual soul 
and taking the average, pronouncing the doom corresponding 
thereto. 

Rhad. Such revolutionary sentiments ne'er made thee a 
judge in Hades, easy-going Aeacus. By what law could we 
with justice give one soul time for fifty judgments, keeping the 
vestibule crowded with hapless shades, waiting each his turn, 
"heartsick with hope deferred"? Out upon it! As I interpret 



8 COMPOSITA. 

the law of this Realm, it readeth — Thesoul that sinneth, it shall 
suffer — If fortj'-nine be bound indissolubly thereto — the law 
abides. The forty-nine have no escape. 

Mi7i. Brothers, I have yet a way to propose. By careful, 
painstaking, psychological investigation into the nature of this 
being, I have discovered that she hath been subjected to a 
temptation peculiarly strong and subtle and especially favored 
by the environment of her earthly life. If she hath yielded 
ever, she is a transgressor ; if she hath yielded habitually, she is 
a criminal. Let us make this the test, trusting that her syste- 
matic moral training, and the strength of her united character 
have kept her innocent. 

Rhad. My experience contradicteth such hopes; but I accept 
the compromise. 

Ae. The proposition seemeth fair; let us hear the crime and 
"make the punishment fit the crime." 

Rhad. Yes, the crime? 

]Mi)i. Here cometh the Queen. We must defer our cc>nfer- 
ence. 

Elder Persephone in a pale yellow Greek robe bordered with 

daffodils and draped over dark green satin; in 

her hair, a golden Stephanos. 

Per. So it seems we are going to receive a shade such as is 
not found in the common-place daily cargo. I am thankful for 
the prospect of some variety. There has been an intolerable 
monotony in the arrivals of late. Now I am determined to cel- 
ebrate her coming by giving a reception. 

Min., Ae. and Rhad. A reception ! 

Per. Yes, a reception. 

Rhad. What gain is to accrue from a reception, pray? 

Per. Well, in the first place, I want a little recreation, and 
there is nothing like a reception for affording a good time. 

Min. The feasts of the Gods in Olympus ought to furnish 
thy heart its keenest enjoj'ment, way w^ard daughter of Demeter. 
If a good time is thy highest aim thy soul is yet full sensuous. 

Per. Nay, Father Minos, be not harsh in judgment. I have 
a higher aim — I would promote sociability among the shades. 

Ae. Ere thou execute this project, I fain would see that 
equity demands the doing of it. 



COMPOSITA. 9 

Per. Wise Aeacus, well we know thy heart's fair mistress is 
wise counselling Themis, divine Justice; and 'tis she who urges 
on my plan. The reception she recognizes as my sole resource 
for cancelling my obligations and paying off my heavy debts. 

Rhad. Thy ready tongue belieth not thy sex. 

Per. As does thy lack of gallantry. 

Min. "Things done well and with a care e.xempt themselves 
from fear ; things done without e.xample in their issue are to be 
feared. Have you a precedent of this reception for humble 
mortal given ? 

Per. Call you her whom Prometheus has touched with the 
fire of so many souls, humble mortal ? What, pray, was Psyche 
whom Brother-in-law Zeus entertained ? Besides Zeus is going 
to let some of the friends of her infancy, Homer, Horace and 
Hannibal, return with Hermes to Earth to escort her down. I 
am dying to behold her ! 

Phad. In your frequent visits to the upper-world, privileged 
Queen of Hades, has this prodigy escaped your sight ? 

Per. Not from lack of interest, be assured. But they told 
me the queerest thing when I was upon the point of taking 
stage for that fair village, famed for elms and educational ad- 
vantages ; for I was with friends just across the river. 

Ae. Let us hear, noble lady, the words of mystery. 

Per. They said she had not materialized. 

Mill. Daughter Persephone, wilt thou never heed the coun- 
cil of the sage, the warning of thy danger? If thou dost ever 
yield to thy heart's longing for the vain upper-world, thou wilt 
find thy free spirit's wings grow stiff and clogged. Thou, thy- 
self, wilt e'en materialize. 

Per. Well, since I can't go up again for full five months, 1 
am bound to have the reception and show just as much atten- 
tion as I please to the new arrival. They say she is the epi- 
tome of culture. 

Rhad. Methinks thou lackest just discrimination in the ap- 
plication of that term "epitome." 

Per. Women did not study law when I gathered flowers in 
Enna. \_Hermes, in pink and white drapery, zvinged cap and 
sandals, and carrying a white caduceus, spring siipon the 
stage, striking the attitude of the ''Flying Mercury. "'I The 
child of Maia, as if at mv summons ! Hermes, do thou 



lO COMPOSITA. 

bear this invitation as directed. But stay ! Tell us first what 
thou knovvest of the addressed and the place whence she 
Cometh. 

Her. They say that she dwells in "cottages," Your Majesty. 
I do confess that I have made a stealthy visit now and then, to 
a building most curious among the devices of mortals. 

Per. Tell us of it, fleet messenger. I warrant thou lost no 
time in idle dallying. 

Her. Well, you see, I heard that there was a votive statue 
of me there, and so I ventured, one day, within the portals — 
ready to stiffen into stone if mortal gaze fell on me. And in- 
deed my blood ran cold at the spectacle I beheld. For there 
they have us all in rows, rigid as rocks, mutilated and distorted, 
patched and in pieces — a heart-rending sight! 

Min. Dost know the Divinity of the place ? 

Her. Revered Minos, I had often wondered and was in 
doubt, for many trunkless heads are in the halls of the great 
Academia. But one day I raised my light caduceus and rose 
above a flight of stairs, and beheld a woman's image. Strangely 
beautiful she was, of noble features, uplifted eyes filled with a 
wonderous look. The sky beyond her was spread by golden- 
winged Iris, and her feet rested on rolling billows — then I knew 
'twas Venus. 

Min. Get thee gone, mischievous youth! 'Twas thou, thy- 
self, that told'st me that this famous institution in earthly par- 
lance is hight ''Smith," whereby I know 'tis sustained and 
warmed by Vulcan's forge. 

Her. Pardon Father, ere I go may I not announce my 
errand ? Charon would be pleased to know whether he can 
bring her all at once. 

Min. Her weight in the flesh, boy ? 

Her. Six thousand avoirdupois pounds, they estimate. 
Father. 

Mi7i. A hundred talents — she'll not founder Charon's craft 
on the stiff" Stygian waves. 

Her. I am off" for No. 4, Smith College. \_Exit. 

Mi?i. That reckless boy would lose his head, were it not 
for his wings. 

Per. His wings become him well. But I must be making 



COMI'OSITA. 11 

arrangements for the reception. Deal kindly with Composita, 
grim Judges. [E.vit. 

Ae. We will deal justly with the soul. 

Rhad. She would not be so rash if her stern lord were in 
the palace before Tartarus. King Pluto is not so fond of giv- 
ing smiling welcome to trembling shades. 

Min. Let her have her way, Rhadamanthus. Since she 
consulteth not our plans, we will not hesitate to utilize hers. 
This reception offers our very occasion for the trial of Com- 
posita Octoginta-Sex. Each of us in turn will don King Pluto's 
helmet — that magic casque which rendereth the wearer invis- 
ible — and, unseen by the as.sembled guests, we will walk in 
their midst and give keen ear to the maiden's speech. By her 
words will we acquit or condemn her. 

Rhad. How so, Minos ? Let us hear the crime ? 

Ae. Come, the crime ? 

Min. It is the direful crime of crauuiiing. 

Rhad. To be sure ! 

Ae. To be sure ! 

Rhad. The fearful crime of but one degree ! 

Ae. Twin sister of Hypocrisy ! 

Mift. As near in kin to Impiety ! 

A/iti., Ae. and Rhad. shig: 

I 
Composita shall stand or fall, 
Condemned if she knows naught at all. 

Thro' this — the crime of cramming. 
The dreadful crime, the awful crime, 
The impious crime ot cramming. 

II 
Invisible we will stand near. 
We'll catch her words within our ear 

To prove the crime of cramming. 
The dreadful crime, the awful crime, 

The impious crime of cramming. 

Ill 

If 'tis detected in her speech, 
On direst charge we'll her impeach, 
The crushing charge of cramming. 



COMPOSITA. 

The dreadful charge, the awful charge, 
The crushing charge of cramming. 

IV 

There's no reprieve, thro' bribe, for them 
Whom Hades' Judges may condemn 

Of the shocking crime of cramming. 
The dreadful crime, the awful crime. 

The impious crime of cramming. 

\_Qirfain falls.'] 




ACT II. 

Scene: /;/ Smith College, Room No. 4, furnished with appur- 
tenances of mathematics. Composita is seated in one of the 
student chairs. She zuears her class colors in her grey dress 
ornamented zaith cluster of cherry-red geraniums. 
Co>nposita. Ah me! "Know thyself"! Clearly the author 
of that sage advice hadn't my case in mind; for he would not 
have set a mortal such a task. My inner workings can not be 
investigated. You cannot bring the focus of your lens twice 
upon the same spot, any more than you can get your feet wet 
twice in the same brook. Truly in my nature ''panta rhei.'" 
Some other old fellow has said "' Femina semper mutabile est,'" 
a prophecy ol the coming composite woman, of course; so we 
will forgive him, hearts of mine. It is true, we are changeable 
en masse. Yes, I should think so. There is no stability about 
this compound. I was calm enough a moment ago and now I 
feel as if I should fly into fifty pieces ! But I won't do it ! I'll 
cohere; and, whatever happens, there is no solution of my 
personal equation. 

Now the pensive mood is coming on again. Memories of 
my childhood crowd into my brain and dance Virginia reels 
upon that chaotic carpet, that crazy-quilt pattern which I rec- 
ognize as the sure record of my multiform pre-e.xistence. Im- 
mortal Pythagoras, in philosophy's obscure dawn, thou didst 
divine aright; thy soul's unerring instinct led it to the truth that 
it had not begun with thee, no more than in thee it should end. 
Thou shouldst have gone one step farther and prophesied of 
many souls, alike and different, squeezed by the hydraulic- 
press of environment into an indivisible unit. Why, inspired 
one, didst thou not add this corollary and save my tortured 
intellects — how much Schwegler ! 

But Schwegler, Ueberweg, Hickok and Porter yield to-night 
to the indellible impressions or my freshman year. Again my 
eager hand grasps the precious paper which assures me that I 
am graciously accepted "upon probation." I walk a full- 



14 COMPOSITA. 

fledged "fresh," and pride elevates my chin. Then comes the 
inevitable reverse and I seek the lowest places in chapel. 
Again I retrieve and win honors in Latin. Ah, ho\s' green that 
memory keeps ! Why do these thoughts throng so ! The air 
is filled with "hypothetical relatives," loved ones not yet for- 
gotten, the only kin of my anomalous being. Homer, Horace 
and Hannibal seem real to-night, and the thought of them con- 
tracts the valves of my heart with thrills of affection. But I am 
choking, I'm choking ! My tender emotions are being stifled 
within me. Some malign power is approaching. Ah, yes, 'tis 
she, the erinnys that has pursued my steps for four long years. 
I see the sceptre of her power, the all-exorcising broom ! 
Enter "Scrub Lady," with a letter. 

Scrub Lady. A letther, mum. Misther Fahrr tought he 
would sind it to yes, bein' as yes war a majorrity. 

Com. I am obliged to you. What a curious hand ! I 
should say the postmark was— Acheron. \^Scriib Lady looks 
on with interest while Composita reads. '\ 

"Persephone, Queen of Hades, requests the pleasure of your 
company at a reception in the Palace, Thursday evening, June 
24, 1886, from eight to ten o'clock." Persephone, Queen of 
Hades, what does it mean ! 

Scrub L. For awl the worruld loike the Owld Counthry. 

Com. Some grind, of course ! Come here; look squarely 
into my eyes. Tell me where you got this. Come now, junior, 
"soph" or "fresh," who put you up to this? 

Scrub L. Indade mum, an' it war the postmisther; an' he 
sed he tought as how ther war sumtings due, but he did n't 
know the postmark. He's new at the bizness. 

Com. Perhaps. 

Scrub L. Faith an' I must be about mesweepin', mum. 

Com. I have no objections to your sweeping. Is it this 
room you want ? 

Scrub L. No, indade, mum, not while yersilfs in it. We 
makes no pretinsions to rights here; it's in auld Erin we has 
"home rule," an' sure'n it's here we's can't swape without 
keepin' our brooms a-waggin nor have a bit o' silence and 
solitude in a private conversation with one's friends. \_Exit. 

Com.. Am I alone ? I hardly know. There is some spell 
about this card. Does it indeed come from the lower world ? 



COMPOSITA. 15 

I could almost believe it. The real and the unreal are ming- 
ling in my distracted brain, till I scarce can tell which is which. 
Maybe I am going to have some vision of Hades, with which I 
am so femiliar, thanks to my classic training. I am sure other 
people have seen visions. There was the Maid of Orleans; 
surely there was no unique element in Joan's composition that 
can not be found in the conglomerate of mine. Look, I see 
one now ! How well I know him ! His courtly air bespeaks 
the friend of Augustus, and the fine, frenzied roll of his eye, the 
immortal poet. 
Etifej' Horace /;/ Roman dress and cai-rying a huge bouquet. 

Hor. Paella Composita, most adequate better "half of my 
soul," sweet union of Chloe, Tyndaris, Pyhrra, Lalage, Gly- 
cera, behold me, the "friend of the muses," the bird of im- 
mortal pinion, the poet Horace. 

Com. Can I believe my eyes ? Do I really see you ? Did 
not you all die, Horace ? 

Hor Non ommis mortuus sudi. 

'I have passed not away through the portals ot death, 
I have not been hemmed round by the waters of Sty.x." 
'Tis for thee to inform me the fate of my verse— 
Liveth it yet immortal tho' Rome is o'erthrown ? 
My assurance of this hath grown dimmer of late. 

Com. Indeed you need n't be anxious about that. 

Hor. Rhadamanthus telleth me one who claimeth rank 
patrician (Adams gens, I think 'tis that he boasteth— tho' not 
Roman, soundeth even like Hebrew,) my illustrous fame's 
imperilling. 

Com. O, you mean Charles Francis Adams. Never mind, 
Horace, my "dear teacher," Experience, has taught me that 
you are still read— pored over by the hour. In spite of Mr. 
Adams, a cultured gentleman must read you after breakiast; 
they always do in novels. 

Hor. Do they love me ! Do they study me in the schools ? 
Discit Aviericanus me peritus ? 

Com. S^Aside.'] More Latin ! ]^Aloud.'] Dear Horace, it 
would do your heart good to know how much we study you 
and scan you. It is beautiful to scan you. 

Hor. Tell me, ''duke decus meum,'' how scannest thou the 
invisible ? 



l6 COMPOSITA. 

Com. I mean read your verses in a kind of sing-song way, 
you know. 

Hor. Canitis cum Cithara^ 

Com. Yes, I guess so. 

Hor. Thou who hast relieved by thy words my heart's 
anxious grief, 
Fair goddess of nature complete, 
Allow me to lay at thy feet 
Small oft'rings of "parsley the long-lived, lilies the brief." 

Com. Put them in my bauds, please. We don't lay flowers 
on floors These are very sweet. Did they come from Para- 
dise?* 

Hor. Not from the Fields of the Blessed, but from a lovely 
dell close by, fair as any nook on my Sabine farm. Methought 
I heard strains from the pipes of Pan, doubtless sweet echoes 
of thy voice lingering in the leafy hollows; for thou must love 
to wander there seeking arbute an4 thyme. My first task shall 
be to compose an ode to this dingle. Permit me to dedicate it 
to thee, " Venus tota,'' Composita Maxima. 

Com. I should be delighted sir. What do I see ! Another 
familiar form, another friend of my youth ! 

^«^i?r Hannibal, in scarlet dress, helmet and shield, and in 
one hand a kerosene-can. 

Hor. Hannibal, the impious ! 

Com. Could my heart fail to palpitate in recognition of the 
Punic hero, condescending friend of my freshman year ! 

Hor. True, wonderous maid. "A man is the product of the 
characteristics of his age and is himself the best exponent of 
it." Such, too, art thou; as the unique representative of the 
nineteenth century, receive my greeting. 

Com. Have you risen from your grave, great Carthaginian ? 

Han. Carthaginians never lay in graves, intelligent maiden. 
I have come the most direct ■ route — the Ivory Gate — from 
Hades. 

Com. \^Aside.'\ Of course, I remember Dido. S^Aloud.l 
Do give me some argument for cremation, please; do you be- 
lieve in it Hannibal ? 

Ha7i. By all that is sacred, yes ! Fire, 7?/'^, fire, saith Han- 
nibal Hamilcar Barca ! Make use of fire when thou canst. 

*A wood in Northampton. 



COMPOSITA. 17 

'Tis an outrage to pave the earth with sarcophag;i. The hate- 
ful Roman sjxike a trutli "Easy is tlie descent to Avermus" — 
and it must l)e kept so. 

Coin. \^.\sidc.'\ I am coming to pieces ! How tierce he is ! 
I must compose myself. ^.lloHd.'\ But, Hannibal, some 
folks are afraid of fire; I am not, because I never carry matches 
concealed ai)()ul my person or throw them in the paper-basket; 
besides, 1 tot)k an elective in fire-escapes, and I would just lie 
down on the floor and smother mysell if 1 caught fire. 

Han. Afraid of fire! Impious one ! Vulcan, Prometheus, 
Zeus, hear this mad mortal ! Blast her ungrateful soul with 
the fiery thunderbolt; sear her eyeballs with sight of the gleam- 
ing forge ! 

Com. Oh, Hannibal, please don't ! 

Han. Be sensible then. 

Com. \_Aside.'] O, dear ! My equilibrium is almost gone, but 
we'll rally. I'll change the subject. \_Aloiid.'\ Illustrious vic- 
tor of Cannae — tell us your occupation in the unseen world. 
Do you ever sigh for the frozen Alpine steeps, or does your soul 
find nobler heights to climb ? 

Han. Dost not know, learned maiden, that our purpose 
changeth not ? My eternal vow yet bindeth me ; but my endeav- 
or— fru.stratcd — frustrated ever. All our ill intents but bring 
forth good. The scorching fire in subterranean caverns hoard- 
ed for hated Rome's destruction, giveth throbbing life to an an- 
tipodal city. Behold the sustainer of Pittsburgh's gas supply ! 

Com. Goodness gracious ! \^Enter Homer, with long white 
hair and beard and white drapery. \^Aside.^ If here is not 
another of them ! I must be a medium. \^Aloud.^ I'm very glad 
to see you, F'ather Homer. Who would have thought you 
would come to visit the College ! 

Homer. Do I behold a descendant of Argive Helen, white- 
armed ? 

Com. No, indeed, Homer. I am the product of the higher 
education of women. 

Hom. Art then, O woman, one of the Amazonian band, the 
man-hating ? 

Com. No, no, I am a composite girl. Homer. 

Hom. So they .say. What is "composite girl"? 

Com. Sure enough ! "What is it?" 



l8 COMPOSITA. 

Honi. Dost not know thy race, O mortal ? 

Com. O Homer, "this is the most imkindest cut of all ' — 
severing,, dismembering my composite heart ! Do you taunt 
me with the obscurity of my origin, cruel man ? Tell me, if 
you can, why your birthplace is scattered throughout Chios, 
Athens, Argos, Colophon, Smyrna, Salamis, Rhodus and a de- 
cade more of cities? You can't get out of it, sir. There isn't 
a German critic or a Smith College student who does not know 
that you are a composite man. 

Horn. Wonderful woman ! I have seen many long-haiied 
Greeks, "Those who held Pelasgian Argos, those who dwelt in 
Alos, Trachys, Alope, Pythia and Hellas, full of lovely dames 
named Myrmidons, Achaians, Hellenes" — but thou O maiden, 
dost surpass them all in thy bewildering speech. Interpret to 
me, teach me with winged words, aegis-bearing goddess ! 
Hear me, come to me, blue-eyed Athene ! 

Com. Homer, you have let fall one heavy blow upon my 
sensitive organism. You are kind-hearted I know, and would 
spare me repeated pangs; then grant me a boon, I pray. 

Hom. Ask what thou wilt, O maiden. 

Com. Homer, dear, "leave out the 'O' please." 

Horn. O pai, pai, I had thought to find divine wisdom in 
thee)! 

Hor. Hers is a lyric soul, not epic; Latin, not Greek. 

Han. Hers is a keen, enterprising, strategic mind — such an 
intellect as ne'er was found in drowsy, lazy Latium. 

Hor. Dread destruction of my race ! I can not brook thy 
savage look. 

Horn. Children "hearken to my words — ye who are younger 
than myself — for I have lived with braver men than you, and 
yet they held me not in light esteem." This atmosphere of 
earth would destroy the harmony of Zeus. Let us fulfill our 
task and lead the maiden upon the road. 

Hor. "07nnes eodem cogimur." 
[Hannibal advances to Composita, produces a huge pair of 

shears and shears off half her bang.'\ 

Hor. "The tribute lor dark Proserpina." 

[Composita appears terrified ] 
Be calm, Composita. Thou dost not fear to take a row with 
me thro' the dull winding ooze of slow Cocytus. 



COMPOSITA. 



19 



Etiter Hermes. 
Hor. [ L fading; Com I'os i ta fo Her m es and p/aiinti fur hand 
in /lis.^ "Pallida Mors"! 

\^Ciiifain /a//s.^ 




ACT III. 

Scene i: Vestibule of Pluto's Palace. Enter Composita in 

extreme fright. Hermes attends her. 

Composita. That horrible creature — I shall faint — O, that 
bark — and the foam at his mouth — 1 know he is mad — 1 shall 
never dare to stir — Monsieur Pasteur — Monsieur Pasteur ! 

Hermes. lAside.] How strangely moved ! [Aloud. '\ Com- 
pose thyself, distracted shade. Make known to me this M. 
Pasteur. Could he relieve thee ? What is his — 

Com. O, he inoculates — for — hydrophobia ! 

Pfer. Inoculates for hydrophobia ! 

Com. M. Pasteur, of Paris. 

Her. Ah, I bethink me. Dost thou not mean the meddling- 
Frenchman, impiously busying himself in removing the poison 
from Apollo's darts? Belike a friend of thine — be reassured, 
he will meet thee soon ; the lar-darting god is on his track. 

Com. I hear him bark ! I hear him bark. Ugh ! 

Her. Be calm, 1 entreat thee ! Never has one come more 
kindly guarded to these halls, and never such a welcome await- 
ed mortal shade. I go to announce thee to the Queen. 

Com. " Udinam gentium smjius ?" "Where am I? Whither 
do I go? Whence have I come? In what new regions, in what 
unknown world, has Death's messenger introduced this myster- 
ious being? Ah, my life was but one of impressions ; shall it 
now be reality?" Shall 1 see things /"^r.?^.^ Where are all these 
minds of mine that knows not itself? By what axiom can I prove 
my whole equal to the sum of all my parts ? Can I be sure ot 
my present existence? O, yes — I have it — "Cogito ergo sunt" ! 
Enter Persephone. 

Per. [Aside. 1 Diimmortales I The crafty god did speak 
the truth — altogether and only one of her — 'V pluribus umiui" ! 
[Aloud.'] Is this the renowned Composita whose strange his- 
tory is now the theme of all, from Olympus to Avernus ? To our 
broad domain, rare, fair shade, we bid ye welcome ! 

Com. Thank you, Mrs. Pluto, you are very kind ! 



COMPOSITA. 21 

Per. Ah, it delights me to heer again the quaint Earthly 
forms of si^eech. I love them and I use them as much as I can. 
You see I am very fond of Earth ; it was my native place. 

Com. Yes, I know ; earthly poetry is full of the romantic 
history of the Queen of Hades. 

Per. You don't mean to say so, my dear ! That is gratify- 
ing. Do they tell about our golden chariot and coal-black 
steeds? 

Coin. Yes, and the daffodils and all. 

Per. And you knew all about it? 

Coin. Yes, your Majesty. 

Per. Nay, call me Persephone ; be perfectly at ease with me, 
my dear. I know we shall like each other. My lord would 
bid you welcome — a stern one I warrant — were he not away. 
He has gone to brother Zeus' to try the mountain air. You 
see he is fond of driving through the Fields of Mourning and 
along the swampy shore. I always told him he would rue it, 
and now it has been declared by Aesculapius that there is ma- 
laria on the banks of Styx ! 

Coin. 1 am sorry that the King's health is poor. 

Per. He will come back in his usual spirits ; Olympus always 
agrees witii iiini. 

Co)}i 1 am dreadfully afraid ot malaria. I know I should 
come to pieces in a shake; and only think of having composite 
chills and having to take composite pills ! 

/'(■/• .Set your mind at rest, my dear. We have already 
made a plan to carry into the swamp a canal from Phlegethon. 
Pluto has made an appropriation for the purpose, and we are 
only awaiting the arrival of Monsieur de Lesseps to superintend 
the work. And now you must make yourself perfectly at home 
here. Were you ever homesick ? 

Com. If I have been once, I have been fifty times ! 

Per. Hapless child 1 But you cannot be here. I never was. 
Yet I hope you will not "miss your mother." 

Com. That word — how it stirs the innermost atom of my 
innermost soul ! How its mystery pierces my heart to its core ! 
Will the power that gathered these elements at strife, and 
bound them into semi-harmonious life, be revealed nevermore ? 

Per. [Aside.] What does ail her! [To Com.] Calm 



22 COMPOSITA. 

yourself, my dear. The journey has fatigued you, I fear. You 
look so pale, too. 

Com. It was that horrible dog at the gate. I am dreadfully 
afraid of dogs; besides, I had no cookies for him. But Hermes 
helped me make up my mind; and finally I got all my 
courages together at once and said "Nice little doggie, good 
little Cerebus," and he opened all his mouths and howled. 
Ugh! 

Per. He does not like to hear his name mispronounced. 

Com. I am sure I accented the antepenult; perhaps you use 
the Roman method; we only use that for Horace. 

Per. How did you like Horace, my dear? He has the most 
perfect polish of any gentleman in Hades. 

Com. He does say nice things, but I am afraid as death he'll 
say them in Latin. 

Per. Why, why should you be afraid ? You must n't be 
embarrassed. Of course you speak the modern languages and 
the classics; we use them all here at Court. 

Com. [Aside. 1 Horrors ! 

Per. And I know you will enjoy it. It gives variety — spice, 
you know. 

Com. I never thought of it in that way before, but I do like 
macaronics; do you use them here? I am a natural genius in 
macaronics. I like variety variegated. 

Per. Do you mean something to eat? 

Com. Oh, no, I mean of languages — a kind of o//a podrida 
— hash, you know. Don't you think it pedantic to make one's 
sentences all out of one foreign language? We always mix 
them; it is ever so much nicer. 

Per. Well, I never did — hear of such a thing ! You must 
be very quick witted. This is just the place for you, Com- 
posita, you will have such a lively time. 

Com. [Aside.] Lively, surely. [A/oud.] Is it never dull 
here? 

Per. No, indeed ! It could never be for you. To be sure 
I get a little tired sometimes; but then, I have been here some 
thousands of years; and, besides, I don't care for mathematics 
and the other sciences. Those who do, never get tired; they 
are wandering off everlastingly. I dare say some of them will 
not come to-night. Here is the telegraph messenger now. 



COMPOSITA. 2T, 

[Efth'K a hoy in Trojan dress, upon his head a modern messen- 
ger's cap, with a lighted miner's latnp in front.'] "Little 
lulus," my dear. Dun't touch him ! He is au electric battery 
bona fide. 

Com. Is it possible, Aenas' little boy. [luiiUS lays a paper 
at^KKSKPHOtiK's feet and glides out.l Why, Persephone, he 
does n't seem so slow — 

Per. O, he is run by electricity now. He always had it in 
him. It blazed up at the fall of Troy, you know; but no one 
could manage him until Benjamin Franklin came down. He 
took lulus in hand, and he furnishes a constant head-light now 
and delivers all the telegrams at lightning speed. We couldn't 
get along without "Little lulus." 

Coin. What a queer world ! 

Per. Let us see which one of the wool-gatherers has sent 
his regrets. \^Takes th^ paper and reads:'] "Lost in space — 
can't come. — Immanuel Kant." Just like him! Philoso- 
phers and mathematicians are all of a piece. You have no idea 
what trouble I have with these souls in Hades, Coniposita. 
They keep Hermes running all the time with the handcufis — 
the categories, you know. If it were not for this invention of 
Immanuel himself, I don't know what I should do ! 

But I am sorry to receive Kant's regrets, really sorry for 
your sake, Coniposita, because — I know — he will be missed — 
that is, there will be — pardon me, my dear — an aching void in 
your heart. For my part, I never should have dreamed it; but 
the first thing I heard of you, when I was up above the last 
time, was that you were devoted to Kant. 

Com. The speech of earth is not all a.xiomatic; and what is 
truth there, is not neccessarily so in all parts ot the universe 
and for beings differently conditioned — that is, with one excep- 
tion, two and two cannot equal five. 

Per. \^Aside.'\ Poor thing ! I am sure of it now. Ot 
course she must love him, for he taught her the "forms of 
sensibility," they say. But what a predicament I am in ! If 1 
only had lier head for figures ! 

\^Atoud.] My ciiild, confess to me, as if I were your mo — 
sister, does not some of the other parts of you ? I can't quite 
understand it, but you are not all Kant. Don't you care for 
other men ? Because, you see, I thought there would be more 



24 COMPOSITA. 

of you — that is, that you would look like more, you know. I 
invited so many more— gentlemen ! 

Com. {^Clapping her hands.'] O, Persephone, how perfectly 
lovely! You don't mean it! Aren't you a dear! How 
many, will there be one for every one of me ? 

Per. I expect fifty. 

Com. O, variety, variety ! Such fortune never came into 
my wildest earthly dream. Memorabilia of Northampton, I'll 
hurl ye in Phlegethon. My soul takes new auspices from fifty 
swallow-tails ! 

[Curtain falls.] 



Scene II. Drawing-room of Pluto' s Palace . 

^«/^r Persephone awrf CoMPosiTA, the latter in white even- 
ing dress. 

Per. It is to be extremely informal; my dear. It has taken 
no preparation. Really, it is a sort of family affair. 

Covi. Are the people who are coming your relations ? 

Per. O, yours rather; kindred of your soul, Composita. I 
took great pains to find out those whom you would be most 
glad to meet and they will all be old friends of yours. You 
will need no introductions. 

Com,. That is a comfort. I never g-.t names straight. Will 
Hermes be here ? 

Per. Probably he will drop in, in the course of the evening. 

Com. Don't you think he will surely ? He is so handsome ! 

Per. You should see Apollo, my dear. 

Com. Do you mean Mr. Belvidere ? I know him quite well 
by sight. We have his statue at Smith. But I like Hermes. 
You see I feel already acquainted with him. I never had a 
more charming traveling companion. He seems to have been 
everywhere and to know everybody. He is so entertaining in 
conversation, so courteous and so attentive ! 

Per. The God of Eloquence, with the gracious manners of 
the Court of Olympus ! But be wary, Composita. Let me 
warn you that Hermes is addicted to the little eccentricities of 
conduct which have been classified up above and so expres- 
sively labeled — flirting. Of course it is pardonable in him. He 
takes an interest in so many shades. [Enter Socrates, 



COMI'OSITA. 25 

Euclid and Sappho, the latter cvearinsr aji ecru robe, luith 
violet border, and a zcreath of violets in her hair; Euclid, in 
white tunic and dark red himation; Socrates, in white tunic, 
brown hi)natio7i and without saiidals. The three pause near 
the entrance and burn incense in a censer upon a tripod. ] Ah , 
the Greeks have arrived. I must be on duty; "When Greek 
meets Greek," you know, my dear. 

Com. Isn't that person a little outre' 

Per. Hush, child ! That is our most honored guest. Don't 
you recognize Socrates ? 

Com. I beg his pardon. 1 didn't see his face. I thought 
he would be in evening dress. 

\_Soc., Eu. and Sap. stand in ainazenient.'} 

Eu. Is that the figure ? 

Soc. So it seems. 

Eu. lam at a loss. Hath mathematics failed me? I cal- 
culated that she would be a truncated cone. 

Sap. This is not she. Where are the many souls en- 
tangled in the snare of golden meshes — held by Love's mighty 
power enthralled, as notes in one harmony ? 

Soc. She is the embodiment of virtue — the many in one. 
Let us approach. 

Per. Welcome. Sage of Attica, and Euclid, the abstruse, 
"sweetly smiling" Sappho too I greet ye with pleasure. In- 
comparable Composita, shake hands with our guests according 
to your cordial custom. 

Com {Shaking hands.'] I am happy toseeyou Sai^pho, Eu- 
clid and Socrates. 

Per. Now confess, my guests, that you are surprised to see 
such unanimity in Composita. For my part, my imagination 
utterly failed to grasp the harmony of her complexity. 

Sap. It surpasseth my conception. Surely it is the harmony 
of the gods. 

Eu. I am bi.sected in being. Reason and sense-perception, 
mathematics and Composita, have become, so to speak, tangents 
of nintty degrees and two hundred and seventy degrees respect- 
ively, and are being produced in contrary directions to the 
goals of infinity and minus-infinity. 

Sap. But. revered teacher, didst thou not tell me that the 
infinite space shall bow together, from every quarter, into one 



26 COMPOSITA. 

mighty, boundless sphere — infinity and minus-infinity blending 
in sweet affinity, all dualism hurled through eons beyond the 
void and the ransomed universe be newly attuned to the infi- 
nite harmony? 

Eu. Child, thou dost hourly requite me that I taught thee 
mathematics. It is the only fit nourishment for thy poetic soul 
— the only inspiration of true sublimity. Glad my heart soon 
with the promised verses on the infinite curve. 

Sap. The sonnet to the Witch of Agnesi ? 

Per. Naughty, foolish children ! You'll wear my life out. 
One of these fine days, when you have run away "mathematic- 
izing, " I'll take no pains to have Hermes hunt you up ; but I'll 
just let you get lost in your eternal harmonies, and see whether 
I, too, can't have a little peace. 

Eu. 'Twere not a dreary fate for us, Sappho, "violet- 
crowned." 

Soc. Come now, Euclid, let us hear, Compositaand me, how 
the philosophy of opposites is at work in your being. 

Com,. Yes, Euclid, why do I seem opposed to mathematics ? 

Eu. Because thou shouldst have been a truncated cone. 

Com. [Aside.} A polite way of calling me a flat. 

Eu. Fifty souls embodied in one whole, I had calculated, 
must have been produced thus : The generatrix of a nappe, 
being set in revolution, encountered forty-nine obstructions, 
forty-nine retardations of velocity, emphasizing forty-nine of the 
surface elements. Yet these elements passing insensibly into 
each other through infinite positions, resulted in a perfect cone ; 
which, revolving rapidly, was run through at right angles to the 
axis by the plane of the ecliptic and truncated into a frustum. 
So, maiden, wouldst thou have fulfilled the requirements of 
mathematics. On the hypothesis, give me the formula for your 
solid contents. 

Com. 2 pR2, sir. 

Eu. Preposterous ! Unheard of — 

Per. Euclid, you are too unreasonable? You go and pre- 
dict that Composita will be a hogshead, and after she proves to 
be just like the rest of us, you expect her to tell how many tuns 
she would have held if she had been a hogshead — just as if there 
couldn't be different sizes in hogsheads ! 



COMPOSITA. 27 

Etiter W'hatelv in Archbishop' s dress and Hill in a black 
goivn decorated with ivhite punctuation points. Pes- 
SEPHONE advances to meet them. Sap- 
pho and Euclid converse apart. 

Sac. Come now, Composita, I will question, and do 3011 
answer me. 

Com. Excuse me a moment, Socrates. Here comes another 
friend of my college days. 

Per. [Advancing zvith Whatelv.] There isn't anything a 
priori about her. Archbishop. She just happened. 

\\ hately. I would warn your Majesty of "the fallacy of com- 
position." 

Per. O, Composita is genuine enough ! 

Com. Dear Mr. Whately, this is an unexpected pleasure. 
Can you tell me anything of our "mutual" friends? There was 
the sober one who never smiled upon us. 

U hate. Alas, poor Morris ! His antiquated tongue has 
ceased to wag, struck dumb. 

Cotii. {Aside.'\ 'Consummation we devoutly wished.' 
{Atoud.l Pardon me, Mr. Whately. I didn't mean Mr. Mor- 
ris, but his chum, you know. VVe never encountered one 
without the other — alas for Eighty -Six ! 

Whate. Perhaps you inquire for Jacob Grimm. Rhadaman- 
thus has him in adamantine bonds — convicted by "undesigned 
testimony" on the charge of attempting to establish an eternal 
ta7i'. 

Com. How perfectly shocking ! 

U^hate. Now my dear young shade, suffer me to admonish 
you. There is too much of levity in the manner in which you 
speak of your superiors. Moreover, a man who has attained 
the dignity of lawn sleeves feels little honored by the title 
"Mr." I know that my treatment of many topics in my 
"Rhetoric" was cursory and inadequate; so it may be that I am 
not without responsibility for the fact that you have failed to 
grasp the comprehensiveness of the term "deference." Def- 
erence, as an attitude of mind toward the opinion of another, 
such an attitude as you, of course, maintain toward me, ought 
to manifest itself in deference of manner toward another's 
personality. I must add this paragraph for the benefit of future 
Compositae. 



28 COJIPOSITA. 

Cotn. \_Aside'] Crushed in Hades too — O, the uniformity 
of fate ! \^Aloud.'] Thanks, Right Reverend Archbishop 
Whately. I trust that I shall profit by your advice, and that 
the "Family Compositae," to which you have traced me, will 
enjoy the enlargement of your "Rhetoric." 

Soc. [To Persephone.] Xantippe wished me to give her 
regrets. Menexenes has the croup. 

Per. I am sorry — 

Coin. Good evening, Mr. Hill. [Amused ai his gown she 
raises her hattdkerchief to conceal a smile. '\ Pardon me, if I 
seem a little overcome. Something brought to my mind my 
first freshman essay — a strange association; but we met about 
that time, did we not ? 
Enter Hermes. [Speaks with Persephone and Socrates.] 

Hill. I believe I had the pleasure of accommodating you in 
a business capacity. Did you not draw on me for a large 
amount of points, Miss Composita ? . 

Com. O, yes ! Whatever should I have done without you ! 
[Advancing with Mr. Hill to Hermes] I am so glad you 
have come, Hermes. Have you met Mr. Hill ? 

Her. Yes, indeed ! Mr. Hill and I are quite well ac- 
quainted. He is one of my apprentices in the Department of 
Letters. 

Per. Hermes, you must take Composita through your estab- 
lishment and show her where the letters and figures and globes 
and telescopes, theodolites, lyres and pianos, cannons and 
weights and measures and everything come from; and into 
the gymnasia, too. 

Com. Have you a gymnasium, Hermes? Do you have 
chest-weights ? 

Soc. Hades is well equipped with gymnasia, and it is part 
of my mission here to see that the youth exercise their bodies, 
and train them for endurance. How much time have you de- 
voted to gymnastics ? 

Com. Allowing for individual cuts, my average has given it 
three-quarters of an hour a day for three years. I can pull an 
empty box forty times without stopping. 

Soc. Pros Theon! "I am staggered just as if I had been 
struck by a first-rate boxer. ' ' 

Her. [Aside. '\ Small favor ought that record to win with 



COMPOSITA. 29 

me. With every cut of the "gym" she cut the God of Gym- 
nasia. But too fair is she to be left to confusion. [A/ond.] 
Gentle Composita, I err not in thinking tliy soul delights itself 
in sweet harmonies. 

Per. Composita, do favor us with a song — some familiar 
tune of earth. It would cheer my heart. 

Soc. Perhaps thy love of music is stronger than thy love oi 
gymnastics. 

Com. They always went together at College. I can never 
hear "Solomon Levi" without straightening my triceps. 

Sap. Pray sing for us, sweet shade. Let us see if any new 
-Strains have crept into earth's music. 

Coin. I will try to sing; but I am all out of practice. I am 
afraid I am out of tune, too. [Sea/s herself.'] The sentiment 
of this song was furnished us by an admirer of the College: 
[Co.MPosiT.\ moves her lips -while a chorus behind the scenes 
sitio^s: Tunc — ' ' ]\Iy Bonnie. ' ' 

I. 
No birch-rods are kept in tiie class-room; 
No ferules or rulers we see; 

Our teachers are gentle and tender; 
From terror and fear we are free. 
Tender, tender, gentle and calm maids are we, are we. 
Tender, tender, gentle and calm maids are we. 

II. 
Up the steps of the mansion of knowledge 
They allure us and seek us to win. 

The doors of our minds they push open. 
And the seeds, one by one, they drop in. 
Drop in, drop in, the.se little seeds, one by one, drop in. 
Drop in, drop in, these little seeds they drop in. 

III. 

No friction is seen at devotions; 
The teachers in concord appear. 

They peacefully sit on the front seats, 
While the students agree in the rear. 
Frictions, frictions, no frictions in chapel appear, appear. 
Frictions, frictions, no frictions in chapel appear. 



30 COMPOSITA. 

Per. Well, I never did — hear such a prodigy ! 

Eu. This is marvelous. 

Whate. No other form of "concurrent testimony" would 
have convinced me that it could be done. 

Per. Please give us another, Composita. 

Her. Composita, kalliopeia, thou wilt enchant us again. 

Com. Would n't you like something more cheerful ? This 
is our very gayest: {^Chorus sings: "Here's to Eighty-Six.,'" 
etc.'\ 

Her. That voice with its many strains steals upon my senses 
like the perfume from a bouquet of sweet blossoms. 

Sap. Ah, hadst thou lived with us in Lesbos, Composita, 
thou wouldst not have lacked for sentiments in keeping with 
thy wondrous voice. 

Enter Political Economy and Political Science, small 
girls with heads appearing above frameworks, rep- 
resenting books, and labelled with their respect- 
ive titles. They are met by Persephone. 

Com. Did n't you like the sentiment, Sappho ? How tastes 
do differ! That used to be one of our favorites. \^Catches 
sight of Pol. Econ. and Pol. Sci.] Now do tell me who 
those singular looking individuals are. 

Sap. Dost thou not recognize the forms? Mayhap Miss 
Phelps has not informed thee that favorite books and studies, 
like favorite characters of fiction, send their shades to brighten 
Hades. These are thy friends "Poly Con" and "Poly Sci." 

Com. \^Hastening toward thetn.'] How strange that I did 
not know it must be you. But I could n't believe it. 

Pol. Sci. Dear Composita, we have been waiting for you 
so long. 

Pol. Econ. You have restored the equilibrium between our 
demand and supply in shades. We know that we shall get the 
true "theory of value" now. Do tell us of its discoverer, that 
clear thinker whom you knew on earth. 

Com. No, no — not that ! Some ties of earth were hard to 
sever. 

Pol. Econ. But you know the "Philosophy of Wealth" is 
out. That book is destined to stop the mouth of Henry 
George and gain immortality. Already its shade is on the way 
to Hades to console and comfort you. 



Compos I TA. 31 

Com. But he is not here. What is the shade of a book com- 
pared to—\_Aside.'\ Book-shades themselves — I've put my 
foot in it. 

Pol. Econ. Composita, can't you contract to rent us a shade 
or two? What would be the annual rental compared with that 
of the no-rent shades? 

Com. O, I never rented a shade in my life. I've only 
matched them. I can match shades perfectly. 

Pol. Econ. There is no matching of shades here, I assure 
you. 

Pol. Set. Composita, do tell us whether the Spanish Govern- 
ment is ignoring the principles of Bluntschei? 

Com. Indeed, I am sure not, "Poly Sci." No government 
could ignore the principles of tiiat noble man. 

Pol. Sci. Can you tell me, then, how it legalized the fore- 
closure of the mortgage on Popocatapetl ? 

Com. \_Aside.] Alas, wretched me ! iAloHd.'\ Really— I 
think— perhaps Vulcan could tell you about it. He has charge 
of the volcanoes; hasn't he, Hermes? You are my refuge 
Hermes. You will stand by me, won't you? 

Her. By you, sweet Harmonia? 'Twere a station I should 
be loth to quit; but I am the "runner of the gods" you know. 

Com. But you are more reliable than earthly runners, aren't 
you Hermes? 

Her. Pardon my saying it, but I am rather sure-footed. 

Com. I know I can trust you. I have been wanting to ask 
you something. Won't you join the Audubon Society? 

Her. \'ouchsafe to enlighten my ignorance, sweet shade. 

Com. It is a society to prevent the killing of birds. 

Her. Ha, Ha! Shall n't I ask Apollo too? 

Com. I believe you are laughing at me. 

Her. Nay, fair Composita. But wouldst thou believe it, I 
once escorted a shade who was inclined to laugh at me, the 
"herald of the gods" ! I remember it well. 'Twas in 1616 and 
he kept me posting from London to Stratford-on-Avon, and 
from Stratford to London, before I could catch him. At one 
time, I thought he must be a being like yourself— composite in 
nature. 

Com. O, tell me, Hermes, was it Shakspeare or was it 
Bacon ? 



32 COMPOSITA. 

Her. The guide of dead men tells no tales. 
Com. Hermes, you have changed the subject ; you are evad- 
ing me. 

Her. Nay, by Dionysus ! I was about to say, while search- 
ing for this capricious shade, I chanced to hear a phrase that 
pleased my fancy. 'Twas — "Consistency is a jewel." 
■ Co7n. And may I ask the connection ? 

Her. Why, when I wear out my ambrosial sandals, and 
Apollo breaks his quiver, well come hand-in-hand and join the 
Audubon Society. 

Com. Hermes, this is not a time for levity. Think of the 
tender, innocent life sacrificed to put those giddy wings upon 
your hat. 

Her. Forgive me, if I smile at your naivete, fair protege of 
Athena, Hast thou not heard of the Phoenix? It is this im- 
mortal bird whose pinions shine upon my petasus. 
Com. "And thou too," Hermes! 

Enter Leibnitz, carrying a curious optical instrument. 
Per. Baron Leibnitz has arrived, Composita. \_Aside to 
Composita.'l Speak a little German to him. 
Com. Es reut mich, Herr Leibnitz — 
Per. [ Correcting her. ] Freut — Freut ! 
Com. Es freut mich Ihnen zu sehen. 
Leibnitz. Das ist gut — sehr gut, mein Kind. 

{^Exeunt Hermes and Hill. 
There is no language like the German for clearness. It was 
developed expressly for the philosopher. 

Com. Have you invented a new opera-glass, sir? 
Leib. Opera-glass, child? This is a powerful "microcosm- 
scope" with which to investigate the microcosms of your soul. 
[Composita shudders. '\ Do you realize mein Kind, that you 
are a unique development of the "pre-established harmony"? 
I have never before beheld an aggregate of monads of the high- 
est order — a republic, so to speak, of monads. Even in the 
highest conceivable being, philosophy has hitherto found the 
soul an individual monad — an excluding activity of substance. 
By the way, what is your conception of substance? {^Begins to 
focus the glass. '\ 

Coin. It is rather vague — I can't express it. 
Leib. Can it be determined ? 



COMPOSITA. 33 

CoJH. No sir, I guess not. 

Leib. I find these monads peculiarly conditioned. Tiiere is 
a strong develoi^nient of the materia privia. 

Eh. Look a little longer. 

Leib. Do you believe, Composita, that '"0)n7iis detenni?ia/io 
estnegatio"/ 

Com. Certainly. [Leibnitz staggers back from the instru- 
ment^ 

^ Leib. Du liebes Hinimel ! They do not "mirror the uni- 
verse"! 

Co7n. O, I feel like — like tiie skeleton of a frog! My poor 
wits are seceding. 

Soc. Tell me, Composita — 

Com. \_Aside.'\ Now support me. my constituents ! 

Soc. Is an education knowledge ? 

Com. No, Socrates, an education is not knowledge. \_Aside.'\ 
I am safe there for the President said so. 

Soc. Is it something over against knowledge ? 

(Jovi. Yes, Socrates, it is over against knowledge. 

Soc. Is it then opposed to knowledge? 

Com. Yes, I suppose so. 

Soc. We are not here concerned with what you suppose. Is 
an education opposed to knowledge ? 

Com. Yes, Socrates. 

Soc. Is ignorance opppsed to knowledge ? 

Com. Certainly, ignorance is opposed to knowledge. 

Soc. Then, Composita, is not education ignorance ? 

Com. It seems so, Socrates. 

U/iafe. Composita — Composita ! Has your multiform mind 
no sense of the third canon of logic? 

Com. {Aside.'] O they've sprung an examination. What 
shall I do! I thought they were over forever. But we'll rally 
and fight for dear life. {Aloud.'] "Canon" means a measuring- 
rod or reed, and is applied to the Old Testament as a rule ot 
life and to the instrument of war because it's hollow. {Aside.] 
O my forty-nine entities are Knights of Labor and are striking 
at the imposition. Can't I coerce them? {Enter Sir Isaac 
Newton, his Oxford caf> decorated zuith an apple; a huge prism, 
covered zcith heavy wrapping-paper, under his arm, Advajices 
to Persephone. Shakes hands with Leibnitz.] But it cannot 



34 COMPOSITA. 

be much longer. This must be the last, for I am sure it is the 
first man. It's Adam. [Advances to Newton with both hands 
extended.'] Father Adam — Father Adam ! 

Per. This is Sir Isaac Newton, Composita. What made 
you think it was Adam ? 

Com. Some association about the apple, maybe. 

Newton. Nonne est cormexiim malum, Composita ? 

Com. [Aside.'] O, they've all struck — all my entities. 
[Aloud.] Please, Sir Isaac — my Latin didn't take ! 

New. What do you mean, child? 

Com. Why, it didn't — make any impression, you know. 

New. Well, yes, I think I understand. That was a serious 
misfortune. Then you had to study the "Principia" through 
translations ? 

Com. We didn't take it. Sir Isaac. 

New. What! Didn't it take, either ? 

Com. The "Principia" didn't sit, sir. 

New. Leibnitz, can your philosophy throw any light upon 
this matter ? 

Leid, Doubtless the "Principia" was not required in her col- 
lege course, but, eager to do us equal honor, the Faculty of Smith 
College substituted the Differential Calculus. Let us give her 
a problem to solve. 

Com. O dear Leibnitz — don't — the calculus froze out ! 

Nezv. and Leib. What! 

Com. You see there came a cold snap the fifth of last Febru- 
ary and I froze*. There was n't a bit of Calculus left after 
that. I felt just like a bowlder after the Glacial epoch— my 
fine points all ground off 

Pol. Econ. Polish is a good thing. It has utility. But is the 
New England winter still so cold? 

Com. Cold enough to freeze the preparation on a photogra- 
pher's plate. 

Pol. Sci. Then you have not dammed the Gulf Stream yet ? 

Com. Not that I have heard. 

Pol. Sci. What ! Are you not projecting this improvement ? 

Co'\n. Ifitisan improvement of course we are projecting 

*The negative froze upon that day. For a description of Composite Photog- 
raphy, and a portrait of Composita, see The Century for March, 1887. 



COMPOSITA. 35 

it, and we will keep on projecting it. Probably the bill is be- 
fore the House. 

Pol. Sci. Good ! The grand scheme will be put through. 
Congress will take speedy action. 

Com. Yes, if your point of view is eternity. Congress will 
pass improvement bills like pension bills — when the Gull 
Stream flows backward, when you can trust New P^ngland 
weather, when you can not freeze a composite girl. 

Neio. I would fain inquire further into the circumstances of 
the abstraction of caloric from your organism. Did you observe 
the sun-.spots when this catastrophe occurred ? 

Com. No, Sir Isaac. It was night and I was frozen. 

Neiv Your a.stronomer should have noted, carefully, the 
degree of the sun's activity. We must leave this point for the 
present. Whatever the results of congelation upon your 
physical nature, it can in no way have altered the compound of 
your soul. I have spent the time, your Majesty, since I re- 
ceived your invitation, in perfecting a soul prism with which to 
investigate this phenomenon. I have here such a prism. 
Composita is a complete image. The soul that gives it, like 
a ray of white light, is compound. Through this prism, if her 
soul be made to pa.ss, it will dissolve into its forty-nine ele- 
ments. Leibnitz, lend me a convex lens. Thanks, this is a 
beauty ! Passing the forty-nine parallel elements through this 
lens will restore Composita to her identity with the finite series 
of her entities in inverted order. 

Com. O, I am to be worse mi.xed — turned upside down 
completely ! 

Per. But what if the lens would n't work? What if you 
should get her to pieces and couldn't put her together again ? 

Neiu. There isn't the slightest danger of that, your Majesty. 
There is but one thing which hinders the perfect action of the 
soul. 

Soc. Kai gar, that is sin. 

A^e'cL'. Yes, Socrates, that is sin. If this soul has not in- 
volved Itself in evil, even to such a degree that your Majesty's 
High Tribunal would pronounce it crime, there can not be the 
slightest risk. Why think of it, if she has passed the examina- 
tion of inexorable Rhadamanthus ? 



36 COMPOSITA. 

Com. \_Aside.'\ O, I forgot the Judges ! I shall be condi- 
tioned ! I shall be condiiioned ! 

Soc. Come, now, Newton, you know more about these new- 
fangled academias than I. Is it true, as I hear, that bj' pursuit 
of false methods they have become corrupters of youth — that 
they have even originated a new and soul-destroying crime 
(cramming, they call it), that of stuffing the minds of the youth 
like bags — rag-bags — with all manner of mixed-up shreds of 
knowledge, until no more can be put in and nothing can ever 
be got out; so the wholesome conviction that they were empty, 
which they had before, is gone and they are puffed up with 
vanity ? 

Neiv. Such charges, I know, are brought against the col- 
leges — doubtless with much exaggeration. But the "soul- 
destroying" element, the crime in cramming consists in the 
soul's not being passive, but actively cramming for occasion, 
with the purpose to deceive — ^hypocritically to pass for what 
it is not. But science must not lose this glorious opportunity. 

Cotn. [Aside.'] "Me miserable ! Which way shall I fly 
infinite wrath, infinite despair? " 

Pe?^. [Aside.] The Judges haven't pronounced her verdict, 
but that is a mere form. [A/oud.] I see that there isn't the 
slightest risk for Composita, if it could come only through im- 
perfection of character; for her moral training has been most 
excellent. Composita, you must lend Sir Isaac that little book 
which you brought with you — the one you call "Catalogue," 
3'ou know. It tells you everything about Smith College, Sir 
Isaac. 

New. I should be happy to read it. I wish to see the cur- 
riculum. 

Pe7: It is a wonderful book. There are columns of the 
queerest names — and just think — we shall see all those people, 
some day ! But let us have the experiment. Sir Isaac. It is 
perfectly safe for Composita. 

Com. [Aside.] What shall I do ? Shall I confess, or shall I 
risk it — pass through the prism and the lens, or convict myself 
before the Judges? Twenty-five say, "Risk it." But O, the 
twenty-four do quake so ! [A/oud.] Won't you chloroform 
me, 'sir. 

New. There will be no pain. Be brave, child. 



COMPOSITA. 37 

Leib. You explained the prism to me, Newton; but how will 
you appl}' it to the soul ? 

Ne7v. By means of the Fourth Dimension. Euclid, lend a 
hand here. [ They fix the pyistn.\ 

Com. O, dissolution ! 

Per. Bother the Fourth Dimension ! Then I can't see the 
.soul disintegrate. 

Av?rc. I fear not, your Majesty. 

Soc. Persephone, it is your attachment to earth that dims 
your eyes. 
Pol. Econ. and Pol. Scl come solemnly before Persephone. 

Pol. Sci. Behold us, your Majesty. By our allegiance, there 
is no Fourth Dimension 

Pol. Econ. It would have no final utility. 

Pol. Sci. It would destroy the state. 

Per. Hush, children They are working with it now. 

Eh. [Looking at the prism] Forty-four, forty-.five, forty-six 
— steady, Newton — forty-seven, forty-eight, forty-nine ! There 
they are every one ! Eureka, there's the cone! 

Leib. Du Himmel — the mirror of the universe ! 

New. The seven-fold soul rainbow ! 

Eu. The perfection of perfection ! 

Soc. Re.store the unity of that soul. 

Av?a'. We must make haste. Leibnitz, fix the lens. There ! 

Per. What have you done to Composita ! 

I^eib. She is all right now, your Majesty, only reversed. 
Leibnitz and Newton go to Composita and find her stiffened. 

Leib. Something is wrong here. 

Neiv. The diagnosis of her character, I fear. 

Eu. [Looking through the "jnicrocosmscope.''^] ^'e gods — 
she has crystalized ! [All look horrified.] 

Leib. There must have been some constitutional defect — 
some microbe in her soul. 

Nezv. Some crime. 

Soc. Cramming, I reckon. 

Per. [Rushing forivard.] O, Father Zeus, they've spoiled 
my darling ! 

[Curtain falh.] 



38 COMPOSITA. 

Scene III. The Bivimn in Hades. 

CoMPOSiTA as she last appeared, white and rigid — a statue — is 

discovered upon a pedestalin an angle of the '''Black Rock'" 

tvhich separates the two ways. Enter Hermes. 

Her. The Composita of Hades, "There she stands, 
Helpless and motionless in her voiceless woe;" 
By stern decree of the Judges 
Must she stand forever so. 
Trio behind the scejte: — 

For the dreadful crime, the awful crime, 
The impious crime of cramming. 
Her. Ah, Composita, even in dim Hades — nay, back in 
sunny Smith, thou shouldst have remembered — Lot's wife. 
So fair, so false; so cultured, so crammed ! Thy soul so pure, 
methought, could not endure the analytic prism's test nor Leib- 
nitz' crystal lens. And thou art a crinxinal; thou, a monument, 
stiff and stark ! Doomed to the confines of Tartarus when 
thou mightst have won the heights of Olympus; for I had 
thought with fleet wings to bear thee, innocent and beautiful to 
the cloud-reared Palace of the Gods — my peerless bride Speak 
to me, tell me, didst thou knowingly forego all this ? Mindful 
of earthly examinations, didst thou forget the Final ? In elud- 
ing mortal "conditions" couldst thou not foresee thyself becom- 
ing of all things the most heavily conditioned — a cold block ot 
stone, eternally motionless in Hades ? 

Composita, couldst thou have escaped the crime? Is an 
earthly college course possible without this dire defect? O 
that I had the faculties to tell me this ! Nay, 'tis false, 'tis false ! 
Back into Tartarus vile Suspicion ! I tell thee her action was 
notf^ee. 

I fly to high Olympus, there 
Before the throne of Zeus to swear 
Her provocation was intense. 
She wrought the deed in self-defence! 

[Exit. 



mmn,^^^ O"" CONGRESS 

IIIIIIIIIM 

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